New archæological finds dispute existence of Wales
Mon, 01 Mar 2010
A lacklustre archæological excavation conducted near the bantam town of Ross-on-Wye, Hertfordshire, by local serfs has unearthed significant evidence to dispute the long-held-until-today claim that Wales exists.
Man arrested for killing his mother in Essex
Mon, 07 Sep 2009
An unbalanced man from the village of Tilty, Essex wanted for murdering his own mother in the county last week was picked up by Northumberland authorities today as he was attempting to flee to France.
Government looks to glasses ban to curb violence
Mon, 31 Aug 2009
Despite protests from those not so keen on the idea, the Government squeezed out an early day movement this morning that looks to ban glasses in pubs by 2011.
East London DIY Shop Reported As Difficult To Locate
Mon, 17 Aug 2009
The blackened, sooty streets of Shadwell
Glowed in ochre, dingy dark
and twisted, inky shades were formed
with Lucifer's heretic mark...
OED to remove word "gullible"
Mon, 29 Jun 2009
It's been the time-honoured joke of the schoolyards, workplaces and even safari parks: "gullible is not in the dictionary." The irony stems from the fact that only the gullible would believe such a claim, but the Oxford English Dictionary team are seeking to bring an end to this long-running mirth device.
Budget Woes for Beekeepers
Mon, 27 Apr 2009
The National Union of Beekeepers released a statement this morning attacking the chancellor's budget for its inclusion of a five pence increase in bee tax.
Fire Chief Warns Over Miniature Fire Truck Danger
Fri, 10 Apr 2009
The head of the fire service in England and Kent has expressed his reservations over the deployment of 4-foot fire engines in the fight against conflagrations.
World's Youngest Baby Born
Fri, 03 Apr 2009
A dilapidated hospital earmarked for destruction was celebrating today after hosting the birth of the world's youngest ever baby.
Punctuation Error Causes Train Derailment
Fri, 20 Mar 2009
17 people were injured, some lightly, when a commuter train derailed at Tring this morning, causing widespread delays across the entire rail network and to some shipping lanes.
Runcorn Honoured in Video Game Legacy
Mon, 02 Mar 2009
Locals to the Cheshire town of Runcorn today received news of an accolade of a very high order as they were chosen as the namesake of a new character in the Pokemon video game series, produced by Nintendo.
Met Office Announces Upgrade Of The Weather
Thu, 26 Feb 2009
The Met Office has today announced a multi-million pound program designed to improve the UK's weather.